How to Build Self Confidence in Girls

Confidence is one of the most valuable things you can give a girl.

Building self-confidence in girls can be a challenging but rewarding task. In today's society, there is so much in the media that takes away from a girl’s self-esteem. Perfect looking models on every magazine cover and almost every Internet pop-up can cause a young girl to compare herself to them unfavorably. Building self-confidence will help girls do better in school and will also prepare them for success as an adult. It can also lessen the chance of eating disorders and help girls develop healthy relationships with others.

Help your girl make a list of things she's good at.

Affirm and re-affirm the great things about her. You can start by noticing--and pointing out--all the things she is good at. You can make a list together and write them down. List the great attributes she possesses. The list can include personality and character traits as well as physical appearance. Explain how everyone one is different and unique. Remember that criticism is harmful and girls can be extremely sensitive. Choose your words and phrases carefully. Instead of saying, “Those jeans make you look fat,” you could say, “I think these accent your shape better.”

Let girls know that a lot of photos are heavily retouched.

Educate her in how advertising and marketing works--they are intended to sway emotions and are not always strictly factual. Explain that the photos in magazines are airbrushed and that the models really don’t look so perfect. Find a video or article and show them some examples of how this is done.

Trying a new hairstyle is fun and can boost her mood.

Help her get a new look. A new outfit and haircut can do wonders. For girls and women alike, a makeover can lift the spirits and boost confidence--although looks are not the most important thing in life, it does help to look your best and feel good.

Volleyball is a popular sport for many girls.

Enroll her in a class or a sport where she can learn to be good at something; find something that interests her. This can inspire her to reach new goals. She also can make new friends and develop new interests, which will further enhance her self-confidence.

Journals provide a place to note good qualities and positive actions.

Encourage her to write in a journal. The journal’s sole purpose should be for collecting positive thoughts about herself, including good qualities and accomplishments; she could start with the list made in Step 1. When she is feeling down, she can re-read it and this will help her stay on the right track.

Things You Will Need

  • Pens
  • Paper
  • Article or video
  • New clothes


You can put some positive affirmations on a card and place it on the bathroom mirror.