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How to Deal With Manipulative Teenagers

By Katya Gordeeva ; Updated April 18, 2017
Learn to deal with manipulative teenagers.

Parenting teenagers is not always an easy task. They argue with their parents and are not always honest about where they are going. Some teenagers may even manipulate their parents to get what they want. Manipulative behaviors include flattery, threats and making someone feel guilty. Because any relationship that involves manipulation is destined for problems, you must recognize and deal with your teenager for your own emotional health.

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Do not allow your teenager to bully you to get her way. For example, if you do not allow her to go out one night because she did not finish her homework, do not give in if she continues to ask you. Do not fall for flattery either. For example, if you told your teenager that you are too busy to take her to the store, do not give in if she tries to compliment you. Giving in to her manipulative behavior will lead her to think that she can get away with her actions.

Speak to him in a firm voice. James Lehman of Empowering Parents recommends asking your teenager, "Are you trying to bully me?" Asking him this question lets him know that his behavior is inappropriate and that you will not put up with it.

Ask your teenager to lower her voice, if she says she raises her voice to you. Tell her to go to her room until she calms down. After she sits in her room for a little bit, go in there and have a talk with her.

Agree on strategies to deal with your teenager's manipulative behavior with your partner. For example, if you tell your teenager that he can't go out on a Friday night until he finishes his homework, it will be useless, unless your partner tells him the same thing. If a teenager does not get his way with one parent, he may go to the weaker parent to get what he wants.

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About the Author

Katya Gordeeva began writing professionally in 2009. She has had several news and feature articles published in "The Chronicle," "Northwest Indiana Times" and "Gary 411" newspapers. Gordeeva is pursuing a Bachelor of Arts in public relations from Purdue University Calumet.

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